Self Proclaimed Medicine Man, Nathan Chasing Horse used deceptions: It's important to have these conversations. Hate can be classified as an emotion of the perpetrator, violence turns the focus on the person experiencing the harm and the system that allows it to happen.

This was my experience in confronting Nathan Chasing Horse in 2007. He had no compassion for his victims. His propensity for girls started being more openly displayed by the summer of 2007. Documentaries, Articles, Indigenous Podcasts, My Podcast is under construction. Archival documenting yearly posts posted with transcripts will be published here. I’ll also link my YouTube videos associated with each podcast published. I also created a link to my GOFUNDME account. I may link my TikTok account

Tuesday, 22 August 2023

It's important to have these conversations. Hate can be classified as an emotion of the perpetrator, violence turns the focus on the person experiencing the harm and the system that allows it to happen.

“Hate and violence: Some participants agreed that focusing on violence, rather than hate, is necessary for dismantling systemic racism. While hate can be classified as an emotion of a perpetrator, violence turns the focus on the person experiencing the harm and the system that allows it to happen.” (One City, One Journey, One Safe Crossing: The City of Calgary’s Public Safety Anti-Racism Action Strategy)

I’ve had many conversations over the years about violence. I believe when I was a victim my thoughts were focusing on hating what was done to me, not realizing not all men are violent towards women. If you are reading this blog and are triggered by my content, then please stop, and go no further. However, I am not here to focus on the perpetrator’s emotional mindset, that being Nathan Chasing Horse. No doubt he’s been analyzed, interviewed, and charged. Rather I believe it’s important to focus on the victims who experienced that harm he inflicted on them, and the system that allowed this crime to happen.

Violence comes in so many ways. Throughout these years since 2006, I’ve experienced such violence towards myself by other individuals. Fighting and healing from systemic racism is not new. I was born into such a system. People defending Nathan Chasing Horse was a shock. As I grew up with these people and thought why they think so highly of this perpetrator, and they think so lowly of me. Then I remembered the violence I experienced firsthand when I reported my perpetrator to the RCMP (Royal Canadian Mounted Police)

As an indigenous woman, I realized after my perpetrator served his sentence and was released, he still stocked me. He still thought I enjoyed being assaulted. Within Indigenous communities, we are born, have families and die. Well so do these perpetrators and mine continues to this day living in the same community as me. No doubt people have witnessed me telling him directly, warning him not to have contact with my nieces. Even after all these decades he still does not believe he did anything violently towards me or the many other he victimized. I was the youngest of over ten women he and his partner assaulted. This is violence.

Another form of violence I’ve experienced is being threatened by a lawyer to take down this blog, podcast, or any social media content. Twenty-seven years ago, I spoke to my perpetrator in a courtroom in front of a judge. I told him what he did to me was unforgiveable; however, I could forgive all men. Carrying around the fear of all men kept me a prisoner within my own soul. It kept me silence, invisible, unprotected, and kept me in a private space. Most victims of violence truly believe they alone can heal themselves. Do not get me wrong, the experience of being violently attacked is and will always be apart of my psychological makeup; however, we are social human being that needs others to heal. “No man is an island; no man stands alone…” It is true.

The sad reality is that for every truth I’ve said within this blog, podcast, and social media. There is something or someone wanting me to remain silent. I want to repeat that these actions against me are violent and not hate. As giving these people who appear to hate me any focus takes away the violent action, they are inflicting on me and others. I explain this concept in the second podcast posted here. On August 21, 2023, I was interviewed. I wanted to be interviewed. On August 23, 2023, Nathan Chasing Horse will appear in a courthouse. From my experience from the first podcast five months ago, I received so many views on this blog site. I received attention from investigative reporters from California (USA), and Toronto (Canada).

I hope you, my readers, understand this violence I’ve described. I accepted the invitations to be interviewed. It did not occur to me that this private side of my life would suddenly become very public. I wanted to be interviewed so you, my readers, could understand the epiphany of self. You, my readers, did not ever know my identity. I kept myself invisible or Incognito. Upon self-reflection I realized all those women who were suspicious, distrustful, and basically Nathan Chasing Horse’s puppets found me. They had my phone number, texting me, when I only ever published my email via my blog site name. Yes, Nathan had an inside source to watch over me and threat me.

Now that I am public and revealing my identity to my readers. I know I have police protection. I’ve documented everything and so have others. I am publishing this so you my readers can understand the nature of violence towards me. Just like my perpetrator decades later thinking he can still intimidate me, so does Nathan Chasing Horse’s followers. This Nathan Chasing Horse is dangerous. I have had his former followers warning me of how dangerous a man he is, and how he wishes to hurt me. Yes, since I first confronted him in 2007, he perpetuates violence towards anyone who confronts him. Confrontation is a big word. I tried to “give him the benefit of a doubt” and he chose to continue hurting indigenous girls and indigenous women.

It is my hope that you my readers will find insight or clarity in the direction you might take when dealing with someone like Nathan Chasing Horse in your community or neighborhood. As I’ve repeated myself in saying monsters like Nathan Chasing Horse are no strangers in our communities. It is a historical fact that is based on intergenerational trauma. Imagine, children raised who grew up to be the most vulnerable and unable to defend themselves. Being taught to remain silent, quiet, and invisible from childhood, babies without their mothers or fathers to protect them. We grow up believing that we are not allowed to defend ourselves and our families. We are raised to believe that only certain individuals have this power of safety, and this power of protection. Within our communities we have created or recreate this false narrative by not seeing our own people as perpetrators. My late grandparents, parents, and relatives saw this phenomenon occurring within our own families. As I have repeated, again and again, ritual abuse existed since the beginning of time. It's just hideous, when the cover up is perpetrated by a government, “a society that chooses who lives and who dies.” (Achille Mbembe. Necro-politics)

We do have a voice and we can say what we need to say and hopefully help others heal.

theworldissmallernowbuyerbeaware

Memories of my late mother saying her dad, my grandfather taught her in a warning that the Dakota Medicine was good, but not anymore. As far back as 81 years ago, fake medicine people deceived their own people for money, power, and glory. Our grandmothers showed us through their prayers helping us celebrate love and helping us celebrate life within our families. Through my own lived experiences, I had to eliminate my own self-defeating behavior. Our people are depending on us to bring justice into our Indigenous Communities. Our Indigenous girls and women are going missing at an alarming rate and are being human trafficked. With little help in finding them or bringing their killers or abusers to justice, I started this blog. I never thought I would live to see such as year as 2023. Today, I feel blessed to be able to hold those who reached out to me in high regard. I am truly grateful, Creator’s Will guided me in my lifetime to see Nathan Chasing Horse arrested. And, yet at the same time, I grief for all his victims who died before they could see him brought to justice.

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Intergenerational truama further perpetuated.

It was a HBO movie set I first met Nathan Chasing Horse. I worked along side my late mother who was literate in Dakota. We didn’t spend too much time with him as he knew how to somewhat speak Lakota. Mostly we were around Actors like Adam Beach and Eric Schweig teaching them the proper pronunciations. My first impression of him was not that of an actor rather that of an indigenous young man with many ex-girlfriends. I ignored his arrogance as I managed my way through being a consultant on behalf of my later mother for the Director and the executive producers of Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee. Micheal Spears was stopped at the Canadian border so his role needed to be filled and since Nathan Chasing Horse was available he auditioned for the part with my mother speaking Dakota to him. The original intention of the movie was to have most of the dialogue in Lakota; however, as production started only few dialogues were kept. The Sioux culture needed representation. I advised them that the songs sung in Lakota would add a difference to the lack of dialogue and they agreed. I suggested they use Nathan’s singing ability and his ability to pronounce Lakota correctly as an asset. Prior to this Nathan was only hired as a stand-in as a Sioux Jailer for Sioux prisoners, nothing more and nothing less. It was in the fall of 2006. Nathan made connections with my younger brother and my oldest niece whom I took on the movie set. My brother started promoting Nathan in the schools and asked if I could help connect him with others within my community. From the ending of the movie in November of 2006 until March 2007, Nathan, and his entourage of three men left. During this time, I reached out to my friends who were having problems with the daughters. We met and hatched a plan to raise money for the mother’s and their daughters to attend Yuwipi, sweats and Sundance. It was the trip to the Sundance in Wolf Point that would cost the most. We tried to fund raise that turned out to be a disaster; however, once members of my community met and supported Nathan the money for the Yuwipi and Sweats were found, but not the Sundance; however, my younger brother was helped with Nathan and his entourage for his Sundance in the summer of 2007. Our ancestors carried within them intergenerational trauma that was further perpetuated in the creations of Indian Residential Schools. It’s a dark place of racism and genocide. Much of what I’ve written about pertains to sexual deviancy. I basically thought the 12-step programs of AA, Al-Anon, Sex Addiction and other 12-step programs helped. As we’ve all grown up around family violence; I’ve met many men who were exposed to such extreme violence. Much I write about here is focusing on is Limerence, because of intergenerational trauma. As the Yuwipi focuses on Limerence practices and I believe was once good. I’ve found as more and more non-indigenous people and indigenous people seek out by cultural appropriation through exploitation. Culturally appropriating our sweats and ceremonies doesn't mean you are healed or that you are automatically adopted into an Indigenous way of knowing. Being around indigenous communities isn't a place to hide your disorders rather it needs to be a place of communities like AA, Al-non and other 12-step programs. There’s no magic wand nor some psychic Psyche who can conjure up a quick fix. It takes time and a lot of hard emotional work. It's just sad that our own people are predators to our own girls and women. I was born into such a way of thinking, and I don’t blame anyone. I’ve learned we as human beings have more in common than our differences. This need for validation and acceptance is as old as time itself, so be kind to yourself and love the person you discover within yourself.

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Tuesday, 22 August 2023

It's important to have these conversations. Hate can be classified as an emotion of the perpetrator, violence turns the focus on the person experiencing the harm and the system that allows it to happen.

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Intergenerational truama further perpetuated.