Ding Dong the ‘NCH’ He’ll rot in prison

When the latest news came out I got messages from friends, acquaintances & social media feeds. I was told once his followers realize ‘his goose is cooked’ they made become angry or angered towards people like myself.

 https://www.aptnnews.ca/national-news/dances-with-wolves-actor-nathan-chasing-horse-facing-new-charges-in-nevada/

https://www.aptnnews.ca/national-news/dances-with-wolves-actor-nathan-chasing-horse-facing-new-charges-in-nevada/

A young couple told me that there are two things; spirituality & knowledge, but if we do not look after our physical self we could die sooner. So many died too young & I need to take care myself.

The triggers we respond to become so automatic we forget it takes us into relapse mode & revived is what we want. This applies to every behaviour under the sun. 

‘As the Stomach turns’ so are days of our lives 🤪

 https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMhyRgXgK/

So November 5 is going to appear in court again. Well it ain’t over until the fat lady sings is the old saying right?

One of his alleged 15-year-old victims had said that when he had picked her up from her school that he went to a fast food place bought hamburgers and then proceeded to take her to a motel. This motel was a CD unexposed room where he allegedly videotaped himself having sex with her. it does not surprise me that he kept videotapes as his trophies or his prizes of who he hunted. Just thinking about what goes on in this guy‘s mind. That he would want to keep some sort of trophy or some sort of regalia or something that would remind him of his accomplishments or his recall trap line . A trap line is a worn area through the bushes where you know you can find food and then you set your traps. 

sadly, in Indian country, there are so many perpetrators who continually exploit and continually SA so many girls, or they manipulate women. There are stories within each community of such men who, in their younger years, started off, being very promiscuous, very sought after, very charismatic, and had many women chasing them. the sad reality of it is was a cover was a fade. It was a shade or a masking of who they are or were and their true intentions. As the decades go by living indigenous community, we tend to see how these individuals grow and what they continue to do and how they raise their families.  it’s only after decades that one of the victims find courage and charges the individual. We see this all the time in our communities. The citizen something new. However, I truly believe that the more people tell their stories the more these young women find courage to support each other in taking any perpetrator to court helps. 

sometimes I don’t even think that men realize their attitudes towards women. I think it’s why some male therapist go to therapy. People call it a burnt out stage sometimes I wonder how that thin line or thin boundary. Even exist for therapist or psychologist for that matter. It’s almost like crossing over. They become or think like the perpetrator, and they basically stock their clients overtly. you have to understand they hold a lot of secrets. So somewhere along the line, they cross some invisible boundary, but it’s OK to be in control of another person. Anyway, I’m speaking academically and again I’m not an academic so I just know from experience dealing with all types of people, especially when it comes to talking about this topic of Nathan chasing Horse. It’s amazing how many men I’ve talked to and at the same time too these men have the ability to do something and don’t. Which really frustrates me because, they’re supposed to be laws that they follow and understand and can report and they don’t. 

for any of Nathan chasing courses victims, I repeat again go to your local police station and report. I know it’s scary and I know that they may not believe you. Find courage to do it. I know it’s hard. It took me 20 years to report my sexual assault. I did it and I don’t regret reporting it. And I don’t regret the many blessings that came after. When I mean, blessings I feel that it’s more of ability to express how I feel it’s it’s a freedom. I’m still learning and I hope to continue learning and continue helping others who want to just talk or want some direction .

throat this whole ordeal I’ve done tarot card readings. I do this as I do this the stories and the reports of sexual assault or just manipulation or lateral violence that comes from my clients very draining. Draining in the sense that it continues. Say in a day that I set up to do the readings, it drains me. I do this because when they come to me, they disclose and talk about things that they normally wouldn’t talk to their therapist or psychologist. this is the freedom I’m talking about it’s it’s learned experience learned knowledge, and the result of it as I explain isn’t for me to promote that I’m gifted. No it’s me letting people know that I can help and yet at the same time only for brief. After they leave me, I have no memory of them. And until I see them maybe weeks months or years later, do I hear any follow up from them about my readings. 

some of the women that come to me live with partners who are so cruel. Women don’t need to live with people being emotionally abusive to them or physically abusive to them. I think sometimes we are our greatest enemies. I feel that way about myself every day. But there’s something in all human beings where we get up get ready for the day and do what we need to do.

I think the lesson about Nathan chasing Horse and community is is to go home to your communities help your families out, help your communities out that’s the primary thing and hopefully Justice will be served and whatever capacity or anybody is involved in helping a victim of violence or a victim of systemic racism or somebody who was just grieving over an injustice that happened to someone they loved.

SAVAGE

these are smudged necklaces that I made for a client. I’m just showing the products that I sell, but this blog isn’t about the product. It’s about a decision I made. This past year I’ve been approached by an organization from New York State regarding a documentary. They were trying to create about Nathan chasing Horse. The potential for me to participate was there however today, I decided that I didn’t want to get involved.

after knowing that there are so many people out there, pretending to be indigenous they’re claiming to be either Dakota Sioux,  metis  or Inuit. There are so many indigenous academics who’ve never lived in a first nations, Inuit or merus communities.. A lot of times academics have read about, ritual and ceremonies and may have attended a few, but we’re never raised within an indigdnoid community. So the reality of what’s out there in terms of people trying to make money off of ritual and ceremony has become a little bit too outrageous. I've battled many acdenics wgive claimed someone in the gene pool is I dive ois therefore they're indigenous. I've had non-indigenoid people telling me what its kike to follow protocols of swearlidges, ceremonies around sundance who voku teer therefore they've got a privilege to tell me how things work. I grewuo knowing systemic raidm and this is apart of the damage being dine. I will not participate in any discussion around rituals and ceremonies and especially ritual abuse. 

It wasn’t an easy decision yet at the same time I thought about my previous interaction with investigative reporters. A documentary about Nathan Chasing Horse. I thought about the things I went through academically to help them connect with people I knew and people that I thought since my sources had lived experience if actually living within an indigenous community. Who had experience helping indigenous people reconnect? Decades of people trying to reconnect using non-insigenous people to volunteer in rituals & ceremonies. Its got out of hand. 

I didn't really see what I was doing. I documented myself, my interaction with these investigative reporters & now have reflected back on the amount of energy & time I got involved with them. From an acedinic presorctive  I had documented 37 pages. 37 pages of worrying if I was doing the right thing by explaining whibi was,  37 pages not of this blog. It was just interacting with with people who were curious about Nathan chasing Horse. Actually talking, emails exchanges with actual people who actual were publishing my words in articles.  I have the documentation and I wondered why did I stress so much about answering questions and explaining situations. Basically, it’s the only way I could put as was academic.this is not his I inaxt naturally with indigenous people & mainly people in general don't or are not academics.

however, I’m not an academic when it comes to actually living my life in an in the first nations community. I’m not an academic when I’m talking with other people within my circle of friends and community. So the decision I made was to just step back and let it go. I think I believe I’ve done everything I could over the past 17 years to make my readers aware of Nathan chasing Horse and to be aware. To raise an alarm that he was out there and that people needed to be careful. Its much the same way academically. The difference is I am the expert. I am like the professor grading the investigative reporters stories. 

I know, unless you’ve actually been in my shoes you don’t really know the stress that I went through. At the same time too just going through people asking me questions again there was a reflect triggering with a whole bunch of other stressors and things that I never thought I would have to deal with surfaced. When I thought everything was fine academically, people approached me from New York State thinking I didn’t know what its like to live in the USA. Maybe somebody else could do it and the reality is yes there are so many academics out there. So many pretending & rewriting our own history to make money Fir themselves. Basically it was what Bathan Chsding Horse was marketing. He was selling a product, he was recruiting more academics to falsely claim they practiced rituals & ceremonies. They did & he did for their own selfish reasons. It just seemed that whatever I was going to do was going to give anything more justice than what was already done in the First documentary. Then I realized I was t.

I decided I have no as propleceill fibdvtgeir iwn experts to fit their own narrative. I know cause my entire life I've been into another culture during the day & return to my indigenous ways of doing things at night, back home in my own indigenous community. I know egatbits like to live here. People do its like living in a small community. It isn't! People do and put themselves on a platform and I don’t need to worry about that or their narrative cause its a waste of my time.. I really don’t need to interact or engage with people. I do have a sense of duty for helping younger people and I will continue doing that in my TikTok and my social media platforms. 

I’m really grateful for all the invisible helping hands helping me to really think about whether I wanted to help out with another documentary. I asked for advice tonight again and I received good advice from so many and I received good emails back from the people in New York State but today it was just so clear that I don’t need to worry about what anybody says or does I can’t I have no control over their narratives and my experience working within the city and even the politics with truth and reconciliation here in Canada opens up a can of worms. The politics of people who don’t know what it’s like to live in an indugebous community and those who grift or steal my narrative exist. Its lateral violence. There are so many other people who are trying to make money and and getting hired saying that they know what it’s like when they really don’t. And I don’t have the time or the effort to argue with them or to explain to people that are not indigenous (Indisn-yes, I dirty word INDIAN) its who I am, a SAVAGE. Peooke may teach others academically what it’s like to live in any community.  a community where everybody’s been affected by Indian Residential Schools, adoption and foster care. So I’ve just decided that I will not participate in any more interviews from people who want to know about Nathan Kee Chasing His Horse. All the girls that were involved in all the women and men who were involved , it’s up to them to to heal and and he’s in jail. Nathan chasing horses is in jail. He’s there! it’s done!. I don’t need to make an effort and say something needs to be done, it dine! My saying. ‘Somebody needs to stop this this young man.’.It’s done I don’t need to get involved anymore.

 So for those who’ve been reading my blog thank you I’m not gonna end my blog. I just wanted to get some clarity here that I had been approached to help out with another documentary and I have decided not to get involved. People will come yoniwn conclusions as so many keep doing in trying to teach me about what I need to know in being indigenous cause I am a SAVAGE. People don't want to see the cruelty, meanness & hard reality of my outer shell, my persona. They want to place me in a sift fluffy dome. Its not me! 

On my webpage or this blog or any of my social media that’s I use my voice you can’t change it can’t change me. This is why I am living within my truth and I’m gonna talk about it , I’m gonna talk about it with my own voice. I just want to put that out there today because I made this decision and I’m grateful for the clarity that I received and why it’s important for me to step back so again if anybody is part of the team in New York State who is reading my blog or anybody who’s out there knowing that there was a documentary happening. Its going to happen and it will come out, but I’m just not involved with it. 

I know what I know and a grateful for all the things that I’ve been given to me academically. I do live within an indigenous community & I do know what its like & I do receive help from within my community cause I am an elder. I've live in povertymost of my life. I don't need more than what I already have. When non-indigenous people see what I have they get defensive. When investigative reporters see me they feel my helpless ess & want to help. They don't see this helplessness is my inter strength. Its my humbleness I carry. Its me being a SAVAGE! )I am being academic ir in western way of thing, I'm being ironic)

My people Dakota Oyate Black Hills 2024

 100,000 Sioux (7 Council Fires) still live & are alive & well celebrating life & celebrating love. 

Is it any wonder why I spend so much time writing my soap opera stories so that non-indigenous peoples have space to understand us. I've grown up around non-indigenous people my entire life. 

15,000 or more dancers is a guess… 

I don't mean to belittle anyone by saying my stories are soap opera stories but I can only imagine what it must be like from another cultural view point. 

Some people say they remember me & others say if course, I say & pray for all people to release someone with protective, reflective healing energy. When I bare witness to people I see a change. In seeing this change I know those prayers of those who are now in the spirit world as grandfathers & grandmothers change through the power of our prayers. I see it in those who celebrate life & celebrating love in this fourth deminsion called time. Creator, grandfather, grandmother thy will is done.  We are all related. 

New charges for Nathan Chasing Horse

 https://youtu.be/DYvUxHHJloQ?si=V3WzGSFGNEPrcq_s

Since the charges were dropped & speculation about what's going to happen next is out there. I had more people wanting my explanation of this situation. People need to vent their frustration or people who genuinely care & then there are those women who are just cruel. 

Years ago a warm compassionate woman taught me something about being a good woman. I had no understanding of boundaries. It's not uncommon for so many women. It all started when I was director of education. I met two therapists who were establishing their practices working within an Indigenous culture from a non-indigenous perspective. 

Both did play a major part. She died at 55 & he's 79. Both were there for me at the beginning & end of my ‘soap opera’ journey in understanding the components of healing. I'm writing this hope for women who may feel impatient about their healing journey. She told me at the beginning that once I started this process I could never return. For me, it felt like wanting to be an ostrich starting to hide my head thinking nobody would ever see me. She was right. Writing my blog is like lifting my head out of the sand knowing I can know the stages of relapse & recovery. Mostly too, many shrink away from these words cause they equate recovery & relapse with addiction. 

 I wanted to mention there is a beginning or an abstract understanding of a beginning. Little did I realize the impact it would have on me an.elder knowledge keeper for young women. Its really a reflection on what happens as we age if we choose to not challenge our perceptions of our own reality based around healthy human sexualiry. Years ago as my friend would tell me about the history of women, most git married were virgins. Most learned the violence of men on their wedding night & would carry their sexual response as being the norm. Talking about how women would find the courage to leave such abusive relatiohios is the corner stone of a beginning. 

The History of Linerance came out of supports groups of women who supported each other in groups of spouses whose partners were alcoholics or drug addicts. These women went tgrought a journey of self reflection & started identifying their adductive thoughts. Thoughts that enabled addictive thoughts around their attachments to their partners. For most battered women this self reflection was a life or death situation with most leaving for their own safety. The more women in recovery from abuse, the more need Fir them developing a twelve step program around this attachment disorder or thus self-defeating behavior. A behaviour that had a beginning. A behaviour where a story of survival was created. 

My friends did say once I started there was no way I could ever return. She said that I would acknowledge why it took me so long such an abstract beginnings of what eliminating such self destructive thought patterns did for me. . And, yes it takes time & patience. My mom called it self love. It also meant taking on the acceptance of what I allowed. I'm gratefully acknowledging that I really appreciate the many women who helped me. In my study of psychology so many taught me or in an abstract sense of having invisible helping hands. (look for limerence support groups) 

Yes, a beginning, there were two indigenous women who both were very promiscuous in their youth. What do they have to do with my journey is that I'm grateful that in my journey I've seen these women have children & grandchildren. I believe they truly believed they were each others best friend. Both appeared to be advocates for beaten & battered women. I say appeared. 

Here my story, when I made a pokice report of being SA 20 years after. These two were in the court room. In hindsight they were like two vultures waiting the their next meal to die. I jest cause in reflection after knowing what they did afterwards. After my perpetrator wafoubd guilty & sentenced. The one went to her uncle helping him sell his cattle. She wanted him consolidated his physical assets into cash. She thought that since his son was found guilty I would take his family through civil court suing for danages. This of course was the furthest from my mind. 

Yes, my soap opera story, did happen. I say soap opera cause I live in a small community where people who get involved suddenly with family member other famiky members question. So, yes her Cunningness did get back to me through her cousin. A cousin who owns cattle herself. A cousin said their excuse for selling the uncles cattle was to help him with his finances. This action took place shortly after my perpetrator started servicing his two year sentence. They really thought I was out for revenge and again this was the furthest from my mind. 

My late father had thus saying of actions speaking louder than words. So yes, her actions of falsely appearing to be supportive of me or any other women who seek justice are not credible. And thus is the rub of holding space for victims is to listen cause its not her story rather its the victim's truth, her story. 

Action is healing, there's is an action. For me, as an advocate is to self-reflect. Challenging, giving it a name, holding space & to finally bare witness. Little did I know it would take decades.

Human behaviour of holding onto to a self defeating thought not understanding just how self-destructive it is in denying oneself happiness. Deconstructing a thought, deconstructuring an addiction dies not happen within a week, months a year. Its a lifetime journey of self discovery if you have the courage to take the first step.

As a knowledge keeper, an elder indigenous woman, I am grateful. My late dad would also say ‘it ain't over under we are six feet under ground!’ It apears I am lonely & alone. It appears that I am not holding space for another. Its taken me decades to understand this transition from a childhood thoughtful meaning releasing it to transform into an adult. Some human beings never transform & remain in their childhood. 

We are responsible for how we treat each other. Decades before I met Nath  Chasing Hotse I met a Kiowa man from Oklahoma.I tell my soap opera story about being intimate with him to my cousin. She said ‘You.told him what?’ I told him I loved him. My cousin said she would never tell any man this & I told her I did believe I felt live for him. I explained to my cousin the reason for telling him I loved him. I had to work with him. I rushed losing my business connection. I needed him to help me with a mebtal health project. I trusted him. It took baby steps before him there was another & afterwards each man was an like invisible helping hand. I had to explain this Limerent I had for him. He understood it wasn't LOVE rather a false feeling that I was dealing with. He needed to know it was a false narrative, illusion or delusion about him. If he could be patient & understand my motives were not to seduce him or gain favor. I know my cousin probably thought all man want sex & not to be vumberable. I mean I don't like men who are in limerence with me.

Its one of the main reason why I remained single my entire life. It doesn't mean to say I am asexual. I've learned being human means holding onto healthy human sexual responses. People don't need to know what I keep sacred. Let feelings come. 

Its Thanksgiving weekend 🍂🦃

 

Canada’s Truth & Reconciliation that USA doesn't see

 

Sometimes I wonder about my purpose. This lady advocates for me & so many indigenous knowledge keepers. I'm so deeply blessed to have a group of young women to acknowledge me. 

Today I had lunch with another young woman. She's going to help me figure how to run a zoom meeting. The editing part is sort of not a reality of things I'd like ovoid. 

I think the more & more I open up other women the more & more I realize just how much it is difficult to trust any man. 

Of course, we are all different but mormore so with how I & other women interact with men. On the side de of being more compassionak it is speaking our truth. As we don't need men to protect us (women) we need them to not be the ones we need protection from. 

Most of my life I've shared or gossiped about any man I am friends with thinking they are friends & not a potential mate; however, I had it all wrong. 

We as humans beings tend to think of healing as a ‘noun’ rather than a ‘verb.’  I believe we do this to ourselves to justify how shirt our lives are on this planet. Having lived decades beyond my understanding of myself I knew certain concepts around healing but not listening. Decades goes by, change happens slowly or we anticipate something Spontaneous whn really its like being in another deminsion called TIME. 

We all don't know how mutime we have; however, sometimes when I see the hooribke things people to to each other I want to hid or jump off or talk until it passes. All these strategies do not work cause its biggee than all of us cause its guided by oir Creator’s Will. 

A few weeks ago i needed guidance from an indivisual whom has had so much experuence with the media. This person’s made me think about my mission. I tgink lije a mission statemebt, bit it ma think even deeper.yoi see normallt i would share my interaction with others but its what was said. I kept this email personal. Its just doing this that I realized that some people (notice not just women) can not hold SPACE.

Its this space we keep sacred. Its a place where we meet our Creatir when we leave his form of existence. 

I'm truly grateful I've lost ves long enough to see myself in this space. Today, I told my young female friend that time is another dimension & that until we've walkescin that space we are still childlike. 

Many people remain chikdlije throughout their lives. I know its an abtrast concept but it is acknowledged by many. As a person there are somethings that is mine alone be it animal, vegetable or material. I just want to thank you for reading my ‘soap opera stories’ I understand.

In closing, much of the work many Indigenous women are doing is educating our own people in how we did or do things to help each other. 

Finding an Indigenous Voice that matters when all others wish to take away our identity, erasing us, exploiting us and false identifying

Kim Tallbear – Professor, Canada Research Chair (CRC) in Indigenous Peoples, Technoscience, and Society

 https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMhrcxxN7/

A few months ago, I received a few phone calls. A team of committed investigative reporters were interested in the Nathan Chasing Horse story. They obviously saw the Fifth Estate’s Documentary aired December 2, 2023, and of course the many news media posts throughout the United States. Keeping in mind that I am in the country called Canada. Much social media does not get to me as laws around Canadian content changed. It’s one of the reason for me to continue posting as my connection to my sources is still connecting me to their situation involving Nathan Chasing Horse.

“A positive note, hoping this potential documentary underscores the vital role of cultural resilience and ancestral knowledge in promoting well-being within tribal communities.”

Yesterday was a National Holiday call ‘Every Child Matters.’ I’ve posted a few indigenous women’s content as to the seriousness of fraudulent claims of identity. Why, you may ask does this have to do with Nathan Chasing Horse on may ask. It does in understanding the human behaviors of childhood trauma based on the history of genocide. This disconnection with cultures and languages is very real. When someone has no references to their community, family of origin, tribal customs and laws, it like reinventing the wheel all over again.

In my conversations with these investigative reporters, I received.

“Once we know the future home of the project, we will be happy to have a deeper conversation about your potential involvement. “

It’s a direct quote from the email. I sent my contact news clippings that were sent to me via SMS from the USA>

Living in Canada like within the USA there are so many people falsely identifying as being indigenous to the land. Many pretendians pass themselves off as direct descendants of the survivors of ‘Indian Residential Schools, Adoption, fostered out and disconnected to indigenous communities. So, I am sceptical about who they will be sourcing. I’ve lived within the United States amongst adopted, fostered indigenous people who have little or no contact with their parents’ communities. They have access to financial funds and those agencies that give them research monies or scholarships have no access to proving their status.

 Decades ago, I was fortunate to meet a PHD professor who explained what being a proud indigenous person meant to him. He grew up in foster home after foster home until he was adopted. When I first met him, he said he didn’t know what is was like to grow up in an indigenous community but showed me two of his status cards from two communities that claimed him. He also said because of this lack of experience not being connected to an indigenous community he never accessed any funding at ALL. Sadly to say, not too many self identifying indigenous people dare to claim their lack of knowledge in what is like to grow up within an indigenous community knowing ones culture and sovereignty. They think its so easy to erase us cause nobody challenged them.

 My concerns about their ethical guidelines throughout their entire production process as they tend to distribute their documentary on major television networks within the United States. It was further mentioned that when they do partner up with a network, they are planning on bringing on an Indigenous Director to oversee the project for the storytelling.

 This is where I began sceptical. When I was interviewed in Canada there was criticism from indigenous staff members from Ontario, as well as other indigenous people. I never questioned their background, never asked if they had any proof of being an authentic indigenous person whose parents or grandparent attended Indian Residential Schools, Foster Homed or Adopted. I did ask the investigator why they were questioning her about me, an indigenous elder with Indigenous ways of knowing being questioned by these young staff members. Who for all I knew may never ever lived within an indigenous community.

 This indigenous Director is going to oversee the storytelling process is cringey to say the least. I don’t mind sharing my own experience with Nahan Chasing Horse. My blog may seem like a soup opera tale, but it my story, from my own personal experience bringing forward my concerns of such a young exploiting indigenous children, girls, teens, young women, married women, and other women like myself. One needs to step back and visualize a predator who did not feel any emotional ties to anyone, not even his own home community.

 I know these investigative reporters have experience with sexual abuse documentaries and say they treat all stories with care, respect and sensitivity. Yes, I know from my own personal experience how complex this story is, and I’ve made mistakes in trusting certain spiritual leaders other than Nathan Chasing Horse. I have so many stories from childhood of false spiritual people trying to revitalize the Dakota, Lakota and Nakota cultures. Its harder to reach the language than it is to pass oneself off as a medicine person.  Believe me, when I say Nathan was not fluent in his Lakota language like so many Lakota elders who listened to him talk. If he wished he was never guided to teach the language only to exploitation. So I warn people, if they do not know their indigenous language fluently or have the tenacity to struggle teaching the language that holds our culture then they are lazy with claim of possessing revitalizing a culture.  Look within your own indigenous communities for your own healers. It takes a community to heal itself. 

I know from working the Fifth Estate the care and respect it took to tell this story here in Canada. I am not too confident about being a POTENIAL respected Elder for this project. I feel there is a preconceived notion about what it is to live within an indigenous community. All one needs is an educated indigenous storyteller to give further direction ensuring it is told with the utmost respect and care it deserves, but is this indigenous person, this storyteller home grown with the knowledge of their Indigenous community. If they are then there are some spiritual Lakota people I will not work with. 

As I’ve said, defining what a good ally constitutes so many layers. In the city of Calgary, home of the greatest wild west show in the world, I think we are sophisticated enough to see through these layers of false identifying, even for Americans who claim they are indigenous or are a long lost princess.

Don’t forget we Canadians had a very famous poster child called “Buffy Saint Marie.” Underneath all her false claims the government knew she was not Canadian. An imaginary poster reads: 'give up your child to foster homes, let them be adopted into the greater world, and become a millionaire like her.” I say this in gest, as the Canadian government knew and they both used each other. I believe the higher purpose was to recruit our indigenous chikdren.  Church and cults have done this for centuries.  We do not need more indigenous people to serve someone's' higher good.  I feel its why I continue to write within my blog. It's my voice! It's my personal experience of telling what it feels like to be exploited, not from just non-indigenous people, but from within our own. It was a tool Bathan Chasing Horse used to convince people he was real.

So, yes, it’s a wait and see attitude that I take in potentially being involved in this production that's being conquering up in NYC. There are so many barriers. 

I hope you will also search out these two ladies I attached to this blog. The insights they carry is so vital in what it is to self-identify versus what is a result of forced assimilation throughout our histories in both the USA & Canada.

District Attorney Steve Wolfson has issued the following statement regarding the Supreme Court's decision to dismiss Chasing Horse's indictmen

 https://x.com/news3lv/status/1839434235935162824?s=46&t=u2MWJKKY2Ro3gmSFi7MVBg

Never a what its your next move?

 https://abcnews.go.com/Nightline/video/dances-wolves-star-nathan-chasing-horse-accused-sexual-114067081?sfnsn=mo

Throughout the decades of networking as well as living in the  USA I have met many other indigenous people. I continuously asked people wherever I travelled about Nathan Chasing Horse. Some of these people who are being in interviewed denied their knowledge of Nathan’s behavior. They cover-up their personal connection with him & his family. I will not work with these people. What was disclosed to me was deeply troubling about Lakota spiritual practices? Practices my late grandfather said & warned his children were once good but were no longer dine in a good way. My grandfather, a traditional Dakota speaker & knowledge keeper taught his children well. 

USA TV satYa Sioux Heros were Fables

https://abcnews.go.com/Nightline/video/dances-wolves-star-nathan-chasing-horse-accused-sexual-114067081?sfnsn=mo

I'll put in on my blogger site. There are other young men like Nathan exploiting our poor Sioux communities here in Canada. Having documentaries educate people about the dangers around ‘ritual abuse.’ Same buzz around oh how powerfully psychic he is. Those ceremonies were meant for healthy human sexuality not perversions around manipulation of other to control. Healthy human sexuality is a choice. Its not about violence. 

I hope people who are scared of ceremony understand not all spiritual people are predators. Most I've grown up around use these rituals & ceremonies to help in their relapse & recovery from childhood trauma. 

Again, thank you

A critique about this ABCNEW.go.com/nightline… USA TV tends to portray our Sioux heroes as being mystical. Crazy Horse & Sitting Bull were NOT FABLES OR BEDTIMES made up for a child’s bedtime story. Our ancestors were not made-up fantasies like Disney character or fable insime Greek tragedy. 

Haven't posted in awhile & efforts to get working website has taken a great deal of effort.

Hopefully my web sight will be operational with two weeks. 

 

I am standing in a dark shirt behind 

my Dakota Grandmother Elsie. I believe I was twelve years old

I provide culturally relevant insights drawn from personal experiences. The rising global in terest in indigenous knowledge necessitates caution when selecting trustworthy sources f or indigenous ceremonies and rituals. A significant number of women in three Canadian pr ovinces have been assaulted, with victim counts exceeding prior estimates. The Fifth Esta te highlighted the plight of 'The Circle' survivors, a group led by Nathan Chasing Horse, o n December 2nd, 2023. These incidents unfolded within the Tsuut'ina Nation in Calgary, r evealing long-hidden secrets. The community has endured suffering due to Nathan Chase Horse's actions, which I chronicled 17 years ago.

The exploitation of Indigenous girls and women by various spiritual leaders is a grave con cern. These individuals, in need of guidance, placed their trust in these leaders for help. R egrettably, this is not a singular event but a recurring issue that has persisted throughout my life. The problem continues even after Nathan Chasing Horse's arrest, with others emu lating his exploitative and manipulative behavior towards those seeking healing or attempt ing to recover lost cultural practices. They are in pursuit of an ancient prophecy or validation for their culture and language, stripped from them through Indian residential schools, f oster care, day homes, and adoption.

Indigenous peoples are confronting numerous challenges tied to our identity. Traditional c eremonies, like healing prayer rituals, play a crucial role in addressing the wounds of colo nization and fostering the resurgence of our cultural identity. These rituals are pillars in ou r journey to reclaim our heritage. Our community seeks individuals capable of meeting our emotional needs. While many young men find comfort in Yuwipi ceremonies, there are als o those who exploit our indigenous community for their own gain.

My website aims to be a sanctuary for those seeking affirmation in their pursuit of healing through prayer meetings. It's a place to find comfort in trusting one's instincts, especially i f they feel ceremonies may not be suitable for them or if they sense exploitation. The site is dedicated to helping people recognize the importance of strong allies, both for and amo ng indigenous communities. Its purpose is to define what constitutes a good ally and to of fer direct communication with me for those who have inquiries. As an artist, activist, and e lder, I offer various services, including crafting tobacco, smudge kits, and necklaces, as w ell as providing land acknowledgments and participating in anti-racism initiatives, youth e mpowerment, and commemorations for Indian residential school survivors.

I first met Nathan Chasing Horse on the HBO set of "Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee" in 2006. Prior to this, I hadn't taken part in yuwipi ceremonies, though I knew they were prac ticed in my community and others in the north. My upbringing was filled with tales from m y mother and other relatives about these ceremonies being a path to reclaim our cultural identity, but also with cautions against potential exploitation by those leading them. Nath an Chasing Horse's persona did not appeal to me; it echoed the roles played by my male r elatives, who performed sweats and Sundance ceremonies to gain support, often from wo men. Nathan's conduct, especially towards women who were infatuated with him, was par ticularly disturbing. I later realized that their infatuation was similar to limerence—a profou nd psychological attachment that often necessitates extensive psychotherapy to understa nd such persona creation. Nathan Chasing Horse had crafted a persona of a cultural reviv alist, sharing songs and rituals. The purpose of maintaining this website is to address trau ma, especially childhood trauma, and to challenge the persona Nathan Chasing Horse has created—one of cultural reclamation and sharing. He labeled anyone who opposed him a s jealous. This contrasted with my relatives' practices, where acting on one's prayers invol ved challenges. It wasn't easy for my relatives to face relapse and recover from childhood trauma. Understanding this is crucial. Medicine people should emerge from within our ind igenous communities, and our people must be aware of the assaults they have endured. T his process is somewhat akin to the 12-step program, which involves finding allies and support.

In 2011, I wrote a blog post about finally speaking with my niece. I had begun blogging fou r years earlier, but a computer issue caused me to lose my previous work, necessitating a restart in 2011. My focus was on the challenges I encountered and on raising awareness a bout a predator exploiting cultural rituals and ceremonies in many indigenous communitie s. I felt responsible for bringing this predator into my community, having arranged his cer emonies and rituals at $5,000 per session. I participated in seven of his Yuwipi ceremonie s, attended several of his sweat lodges, and one Sundance. I watched his supporters, met newcomers, and questioned his actions. Although I supported him until fall 2007, suspici on arose a year after meeting him, leading to confrontation. I confronted his followers at a sweat lodge, but they did not believe me. I challenged a support group of women who ha d sought Nathan's help for their teenage daughters, but again, I was disbelieved. Since Na than Chasing Horse was an American citizen, I had to wait for his return to Canada in fall 2 007 before I could report him to the police. My actions were due to the disbelief I faced an d the lack of responses to my emails sent to various organizations that had promoted Nat han Chasing Horse, seeking validation of his credibility as a youth worker. Despite disclos ing my niece's sexual assault to many, the support from the community was absent, influe nced by the persona he projected as a spiritual leader held in high regard.

It took me decades to come to terms with my own sexual assault, and six years for the ca se to reach court. This experience taught me the importance of supporting other victims o f sexual assault—simply being there and offering them eight minutes to be heard. I know t he pain of not being believed, and through my website, I strive to ensure my readers and t hose who email me feel believed and understood. Despite the two decades it took for the perpetrator to be apprehended, and for the young women, some as young as eight, to co me forward and file a complaint, I am profoundly grateful that I was able to maintain my Blog.

I'm an elder my. name is Marina Ann Crane My. childhood name is Haphan Kinyewakan - F lying. Holy. I am knowledge keeper of indigenous truths. My spiritual practices are Dakota, and I focus on healing through traditional teachings.

People do source me out via email or through my social media platforms. I book appointm ents for talks in public forums and on zoom conferences. I sell smudge kits and smudge n ecklaces, book tarot card readings and I am a Reiki Master. I am retired.

Prior to being featured on the Fifth Estate, I spoke freely about my experience with Natha n Chasing Horse; however, today, I find that must schedule interviews via zoom on this toa particular topic.

My marketing:

• zoom meetings $150 per hour

• tarot card reading $30 per 10 minutes

• smudge kits 15g $55 per kit

• smidge necklaces $45 per necklace

• land acknowledgement $300

• Indigenous Knowledge Keeper Sessions $300

• guest speaker price varies including hotel room, car rental, mileage, Honorarium • Reiki healing $180 per one hour session

• Reiki Teaching level one, level two, level three (Negotiable)

• Commissioned Acrylic and Oil Painting (Negotiable $3,000 - $6,000)

Keywords:

Nathan Chasing Horse, Murdered and Missing Indigenous People, Yuwipi Ceremony, Sweat Lodge Ceremony, Healthy Human Sexuality, Indigenous Ways of Knowing, Land Acknowledgement, Tobacco, Sweetgrass, Sage, Cedar, Smudge, Tarot, Reiki

Elder Marina Crane (Hapan Kinyewakan) is a Knowledge Keeper, Spiritual Guide, and Hold er of Indigenous Truth who identifies culturally as Sioux. Her spiritual practices are Dakod a, and her home is Tsuu T'ina First Nation. As a visual artist whose practice focuses on he aling through traditional teachings, Marina's artistic spirit is guided by Kinyewakan (Flying Holy) 

As a child, Haphan Kinyewakan was fluent in the Sioux language. The first day she arrived at school, the child’s teacher informed Haphan Kinyewakan that her new identity was Ma rina Crane from that day forward. Attending Indian Day School, Residential School, and cit y schools strengthened her resilience and ignited her social activism. Marina confronts ra cism through lived experience, bearing witness by naming it so that humanity may heal fro m the damage oppression has inflicted on culture and identity.

CERTIFICATIONS 

Aug 2009 – May 20 14

Supportive Counselling Certificate – Mount Royal University – Calgary, AB

Behavioural Strategies Certificate – Mount Royal University – Calgary, AB

Children’s Mental Health Certificate – Mount Royal University – Calgary, AB

Conflict Resolution – Year-long program – Course Completion – Mount Royal University – Calgary, AB

Reiki Master/Teacher Levels 1, 2, 3 – Dr. Alishia Mahmud Alibhai, PhD (Psychology) – Ca lgary, AB

Indigenous Addictions Services Certificate – Nechi Institute – Calgary, AB 

DEGREE

Bachelor of Fine Arts – Alberta College of Art and Design – Calgary, AB Aug 1998

Major in Painting – Minor in Drawing

Bachelor of General Science – Utah Valley University – Orem Utah, USA – May 1987

Major in Social Science – Minor in Science

Aug 1994 – Aug 1980

WORK AND VOLUNTEER EXPERIENCE

Elders Ways of Knowing - Planet Youth Spring 2022 Working with Youth Workers in establishing Youth Elder Programming Miskanawah.ca

Elders Knowledge Keepers - Calgary Anti-Racism Strategies

habituscollective.ca

 Elders Guidance Circle – Indian Residential School Memorial - Fall 2022 Nov 2021 – Present

Working with Parks Foundation, City of Calgary Parks, and the City of Calgary, Indigenous Advisors provided consultation on land allocation for Indian Residential School Memorial.

Mountain Standard Time Performance Art

Board of Directors – Director r 2024

Board of Directors – Interim Chair pt 2023

Moh’kinstis Public Art Guiding Circle – City of Calgary ne 2023

Working with City of Calgary to decolonize the city’s Public Art processes

July 2021 – Ma Sept 2022 – Se Aug 2018 – Ju

Indigenous Art Residency – Artist in Residency – City of Calgary Aug 2018

Mar 2018 – The Residency was under the umbrella of the Moh’kinstis Public Art Guiding Circle

Banff Centre for Arts and Creativity – Banff, Alberta Nov 2018 – M ar 2020

Elder and Knowledge Keeper for Visual and Performing Arts Programs

SELLING ONLINE -

Smudge kits grinded, milled into a fine combination of Tobacco, Sage, Cedar, Sweetgrass . Picked by indigenous peoples with land acknowledgments protocol labelled within the br anding of the product packaging. (15g smudge)

• $55.00 per Smudge Kit

• Smudge Kit with Smudge Necklace per set $100

• orders over 30 kits & necklace combination $75 per combination

Embracing our unique identities

 https://www.theglobeandmail.com/canada/british-columbia/article-dna-testing-shows-mary-ellen-turpel-lafond-has-indigenous-ancestry/

• Before Covid, a lady contacted me through ancestry.com. She told me that we were related and that she was looking for her father. I was concerned that her father might be one of my close relatives, like my late father or late uncles. As we corresponded, I tried to find out more about who her father might've been. However, I lost touch with her as time went by. 
• When Covid hit, she passed away in September. About a year after that, her son contacted me. He was doing the same research as his mother had done before. This time, he was looking for his grandfather, his mother’s father. I asked him for photos to see which side of my family he would be related to. As I wasn't sure it was on my late father’s side. I asked him for photos of himself & his late mother. After reviewing his photos, I realized he looked similar to my nieces and nephews, so he must be related to my mother's side of the family. Then I figured out which of my uncles could be his father, and I gave him a name. He contacted my uncle, and through my uncle’s partner, the son found his grandfather.
• The reason I'm sharing this story is that it was originally his mother who took the DNA test, and then he took the DNA test as well. This test, along with his resemblance to my relatives on my mother's side, helped him find his grandfather. 
• Prior DNA led me to have over 3,000 to 6,000 3rd -4th cousins & another 1000 first - 2nd cousins as a result. There are at least approximately 200,000 Sioux people in the Americas, and only a small percentage have taken their DNA tests. Due to the amount of traveling I've done and the reservations I've visited, I was able to determine the origins of the last names of these people. I have even met many of my relatives before knowing that I was related to them. 
• It's important to remember that there are various reasons why someone may not know their family connections. Some children were born out of wedlock, some women were shamed into keeping their father's identity a secret, and some people may have been disowned by their families. It's crucial to consider these possibilities when searching for family connections. 
• I also suspect that the lawyer, a female, within this story I originally posted initially claims she submitted her DNA. Within our communities there's family resemblance & oral history to fall back on. As the article on this lawyer being accused of pretending to be indigenous seems murky at best. She may have cheated on the DNA test, cause nobody watched her take the test, first of all. Second, there would relative from Norway House Manitoba who would be connected just like indigenous connection to thousands of my relatives. It's important to ensure the integrity of DNA tests, and I believe that she may have used someone else's DNA to pass as Indigenous from Norway House. In Norway House, most Indigenous people would recognize family connections based on resemblance, just like my nephew, who looks most Indigenous among his siblings and resembles my niece and nephew. 
• I believe this female lawyer should seek out Indigenous people in Norway House who look similar to her and double-check her DNA test to find out which Cree family she belongs to. It's also important for her to recognize the Indigenous communities she's related to. 
• It concerns me & many others that some people may falsely claim Indigenous heritage. I'm grateful that the lady has been reprimanded, and I hope that she can let go of any false narrative she created. It's important to respect the Indigenous community and not to make false claims of heritage. It also amazes me that non-indigenous people read these newspapers articles not thinking about what children stolen from our communities. 
• There's just no excuse to support this pretending female lawyer. She's in a lot of trouble from the bar association in BC. Like ibsaud its murky waters for those who do not get it. For decades we've welcomed home our lost relatives. 
• In the article there's no mention of any extended family or how many 1st, 2nd, 3rd & 4th cousins are indigenous. 
• 
  

I find this article interesting in that the focus is on her rather than an actual sample taken under supervision. She's is under disciplinary action yet there's no call for anyone to supervise her actually seeing her take the DNA test. I’ll explain why this is important, as its a process. 

It sounds my like someone lying on taking piss test by using some one elses piss in order to pass a drug test. Until some actually sees the person pissing in a cup the sample in question is questionable. 

This article has a specialist say she submitted but it was not supersized. 

There's the rub (please read the articles that follow) U’ll elaborate more on indigenous ways of know.

“I’ve been thinking about the fascinating questions and answers that could emerge if METL actually shared her DNA test results, and not just vague representations of what was found.

There are many factors that go into constructing an individual’s genetic ancestry analysis. Remember, these are not close biological relative tests that verify genetic connections between parent and child or between siblings. Genetic ancestry tests trace probable genetic connections (often distant) between individuals and “populations” original to continents. These tests are precise in some ways, e.g. the calculations they use, but imprecise in other ways related to sample sizes and how “population” categories are named and determined. Groups that are widely disparate geographically (say ranging from the north to the tip of South America) can be grouped into a population called "Indigenous" or "Native American." So-called Indigenous DNA markers are not specific to one Nation, People, or Tribe (whichever word you prefer). Also, “Indigenous DNA” alone (i.e. without tribal or nation genealogical documentation) is strongly found in individuals/populations sampled who identify not as Indigenous, but as “Hispanic” or “Latino.” Yes, they have so-called Indigenous ancestry, but Indigenous peoples are not defined only by such ancestry. And many who have it do not have an ancestor who lived among an Indigenous or tribal people for centuries. They have for centuries identified as other than what we today call Indigenous. Finally, there have been rare instances in which so-called “Native American” markers were found in individuals with verifiable ancestry in other parts of the world, and none in the Americas. Therefore, such tests cannot be used alone without genealogical and other paperwork to make robust determinations about an individual's biological, social, and political relationships or status. They can help, but they are not alone definitive. 

METL’s DNA test may well open up other scenarios for her ancestry, which she may or may not have suspected. But without comparing and triangulating her test results with documents and interviews with living people, we cannot assume the test proves her very specific assertion about being CREE from NORWAY HOUSE. She didn’t just claim to be “Indigenous.” Her specific claim has been strongly contradicted by genealogical, historical, and interview evidence.

Hold on and wait for actual data. If it is not forthcoming, the extensive genealogical and historical work done on METL’s ancestry to date remains authoritative. 

And by the way, if she did want to sue CBC and use those test results as evidence in her case, she’d need to release them. Then those of us who understand the intersections of DNA, genealogy, and Indigenous nationhood could examine them. Right now, she’s getting away with using her alleged test results as evidence in support of her to-date heavily challenged claims while not letting us see the evidence.”

 (Kim TallBear (She/Her) • 2nd Professor and Canada Research Chair in Indigenous Peoples, Technoscience, and Society at University of Alberta, Faculty of Native Studies)

The psychological damage is what was created so many who deny. Deny what its like to grow up in an indigenous community. 

Growing up as a Treaty I didn't realize all the different communities of indigenous people who were considered lower class than the Treaty people. The Sioux, Metis & Inuit were lower than Treaty people. As a treaty, if married any anyone who was not Treaty I would lose my status. Those from a lower caste who married a settler gained a higher caste status. 

Now this pretendians tell their traumatic story as that of a Science Fiction novel. Those who read & accept these stories are not holding space for what trauma really is unless they stop denying their own shame of being non-indigenous.

All people experience trauma!

The need to control a narrative that suits their trauma from the fictitious, romanticized, almost mythological origins of being indigenous, is damaging.

The results of trauma are real. The focus for all Indigenous people is entering into a renaissance for our youth by challenging these claims. The respect of learning from elders & seeing the sacrifices made not just these 100 years rather thousands is here.

I have relatives who actually are making an effort to find their orgins with the help of indigenous communities. When a pretendian lies about the lack of connection they are completely wrong.

It amazes me how public media focuses on the high achievements of these pretendians’s pretenses. 

Its like their ego wants to believe alien life is searching for them as a way of escapism. This colonial way of thinking that their standards is higher is so full of fallacies. 

The question they don't understand is what makes them think they are above the Creator, Grandfather or Grandmother. The saying we are related means just that. ‘We are raised to know those that came before us!’ This helps us!

Its these same people & their ancestors who did nothing when thousands of children who were dying in those hell holes called ‘Indian Residential Schools.’ Canadian government cared nothing about Caste an indigenous people belonged. Indian Act created this & its these pretendian ancestors who made themselves the highest Caste in Canada. SHAME! SHAME! SHAME!

Systemic racism exists from that of ‘knowing how to talk’ when in the company of non-infigenous for the sake of safety leaving non-indigenous people silent, or appearing to be complacent. 

A Caste system created by the Canadian government, elevated non-indigenous women into two castes putting them belonging to two castes: non-indigenous & treaty status. They not realizing, from their pack of education or lack of taught indigenous protocols, there was an even lower caste than what they married into. Within a Caste system there existed an even lower Caste, the culture of the ‘untouchables’ or (Sioux, Metis, Inuit). When these women either married or in common-in-law believe their privilege gives them authority is WRONG! It onky elevated them into two upper Castes.

They do a disservice to all those indigenous people who are reconnecting from being displaced. Stolen, adopted or fostered indigenous children, many search using their DNA & connections to the LAND.

When I gather smudge its not a ‘commercial enterprise’ rather way to identify, using protocols to help actual indigenous people reconnect with their Tribal ancestors, so they know who cane before them. 

Pretendians are like Sweetgrass. When I think of buying Sweetgrass rather than picking its so expensive. Decades ago nobody cared about Sweetgrass but now its a trend because it majes money, a way of idenrifying as upper Caste. Identifying as indigenous is a trend. But like all trends it as no purpose. Its lije an adduction. Their is no spiritual practice of reconnecting to the land or their tribe. For them, these pretendians, must traces their own ‘old world tribal connections.’ Way back before they were christainized’ 

Example, IF her European ancestors were WITCHES then she must connect with those ancestors using their protocols & not OURS. I see this happening in a twisted way. They are so far removed from their ancestors, these ‘settler’ or ‘colonial’ have lost their tribal roots from the OLD WORLD.

It was foretold of a WHITE SPIRITUAL ANIMAL will appear. This was centuries before Columbus. For 500 hundred years now this spiritual animal has lived in the NEW WORLD. 

Never in the history of humanity was or is there threats of mass extinction. It took 500 years & only noe are more & more people confused. Imagine a WHITE ANIMAL killing 100 million indigenous peoples im the Americas. Now, imagine the A-bomb capable of mass extinction events. Now, look at Climate change & the lack of disrespect for ALL ANIMALS & ALL LIVING THINGS. 

I tend to believe, in a spirutual sense that Creator isolated the indigenous peoples of the Americas for a spirutual teaching. Just think about what we as humanity (ALL HUMANITY) that we did so wrong thousands of years ago. We are experiencing these facts in our sciences. 

Yet evidence shows our ancient ancestors (ALL ANCESTORS) were connected then separated. CREATORS’ WILL BE DONE…